Understanding of differences in patterns of communication practices is important for proper interaction with people. It is obvious that gender differences in communication practices really exist, and other person could be pretty sensitive to these differences. Linguist, journalists and psychologists pay attention to the fact that men and women have different patterns of communication, and as a result it is sometimes difficult for them to understand each other. These groups use different styles and ways of communication.
Having studied the way and style women speak, it could be concluded that the main goal of their communication style is to establish interpersonal relationships or to maintain them at a comfortable and suitable level. Being more open-hearted and emotional, women tend to share their experience, ideas, thoughts and emotions. Besides, women are confident that the core essence of any relations is a good talk and communication. They try to learn more from their partner in the conversation.
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Making a psychological portrait of women’s speech, it is obvious that women get more emotionally involved into communication, so they demonstrate more responsiveness compared to men. Talking to a woman, a person eventually feels more appreciated, valued, as women make people they are talking to feel like a part of their lives, totally included into everything that is going on in a woman’s life. Women get engaged in a conversation both verbally and non-verbally (by touching, nodding or in any other non-verbal way showing their response to the communication. Women can talk about several topics at the same time without concentrating on a specific topic, and if they interrupt the person they are talking to, it is basically a sign of interest or an attempt to affirm their partner.
Speech patterns of men demonstrate their confidence and superiority. Men listen to the people they are talking to not because they want to get involved in other person’s life, but because they tend to give advice. Being more rational compared to women, men are problem-solvers, so when communicating, they try to get strict facts and information that can be used to offer a solution. Being more talkative compared to women, men often dominate conversations, talking fore frequently, interrupting other person talking to gain control of conversation. Language of men is harsh, filled with authority, it is direct and forceful, as they have no wish to demonstrate their sensitivity or responsiveness.
Through communication, women are looking for cooperation and relationships. They are searching for similarities between themselves and people they are talking to, as such issues would help to make a bond between those communicating. They show sympathy, appreciation and support. Unlike them, men are about competitiveness and demonstration of their success and accomplishments. According to analysis by F. Prinsen, male-only communication groups demonstrated “tension, abusive language, attacks, calls for action, and sticking to one’s opinion”, while in female-only groups “expression of individual opinions, mild or intense reactions, self-disclosure and attempts at tension prevention or reduction” (Prinsen 406) prevailed.
Comprehension and style of communication are very subjective, as it they are influenced by attitude, morality, consequences concern or disregard. From the moment of birth gender communication differences become apparent: boys and girls are taught to speak differently, as what is considered normal for boys to say, for girls could be inappropriate to use. This could be reviewed as linguistic inequality, as “women experience linguistic discrimination in two ways: in the way they are taught to use language, and in the way general language treats them” (Lakoff 39). So, different patterns of socialization lead to emerging of the gender differences in communication.
Different communication styles result in diverse styles of leadership, decision-making and behavior, for example, when women are given a task, they try establishing relationships prior to accomplishing it. By doing so, they interact easily, as they are aware who has necessary information, and they can come straight to the person in question. Men, on the contrary, get straight to accomplishing the given task. They prefer to build the relationships in the process, but not prior to finishing the project.
Getting back to communication style differences, we should mention that men and women comprehend non-verbal sign differently. For example, with a nod woman shows that she is listening, and man ‘reads’ nod as a sign of agreement. Such presumably minor differences sometimes could result in big misunderstanding, as man thought that she agreed with him, but actually she didn’t. Men tend to stay neutral, not giving any body language signs to those who they communicate with. This neutral state of mind can be miscomprehended by women: for them neutral reaction is a sign of boredom, so a woman would feel uncomfortable to continue this sort of conversation.
In conclusion, it is evident that men and women have different styles wand ways of communication, so gender differences in communication practices aren’t a myth. This issue is being carefully reviewed by the linguists for the last decade, but still requires a thorough analysis. The main characteristic features of communication differ for men and women because of the different ways of socialization, behavior, type ands way of thinking etc. Gender communication differences reveal mainly socialization differences. To get a precise idea of a full list of such differences, this issue should be reviewed not only from the linguistic, but also from sociological and psychological points of view. Such examination would support the idea of women being more sensitive and inclusive in communication, and men being more reserved, goal-oriented and problem-solving in their way of communication.
- Lakoff, R.T. Language And Woman’s Place: Text And Commentaries. Rev. and expanded ed. New York: Oxford University Press, 2004. Web. 20 Apr. 2017
- Prinsen, F.R., Volman, M.L.L., Terwel, J. “Gender-related differences in computer-mediated communication and computer-supported collaborative learning.” Journal of Computer Assisted Learning, 23, 2007, pp. 393-409. Web. 20 Apr. 2017.