As a sixth grader, I was one of the best soccer players in class. Soccer was my lifetime choice and a great ambition for the future. At least, it was my overreaching childish dream I would never quit, at least then.
One day we had to play against the other class as part of the interclass soccer series. The game was strategically important as every class fought for getting more points and a greater score by the end of the school year. Prior to the game, my father called me for an urgent help our neighbor needed with the fallen tree. Of course, I could not reject such a request. On the other hand, I realized that the game was due to start without me. My class lost the game, and so the next morning I was bullied by my classmates. Surely, they blamed it all on me.
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When I came to school the following morning, all the boys kept silent as if though they saw me for the first time. Then the strongest bully hit me and I fell down. The physical pain, though, was not as offensive as the emotional one. I immediately got subdued and lost interest in everything. For the following week, my grades went down while the boys kept their bullying against me.
When I came home that day, it seemed like the end of life. I tried to watch TV and play the Nintendo game, though nothing seemed to sooth my low spirits. I cried ant tried to drink dad’s substance. I even thought of suicide the other day. What helped me most was a prayer to God. I sincerely asked for help for I loved soccer so much. I could not imagine myself being excluded from the class team and not playing anymore. The team was my whole life then and, of course, I could not play anywhere else besides it. God, probably, knew that my story was not the worst bullying offence in the world, and so helped me to overcome it.
No matter how far I realized that I had betrayed my classmates in such an important game, still I thought that the bullying on their part was unfair. Their retaliation filled with childish aggressiveness, bad language, occasional punches and absolute ignorance seemed like the act of cruel revenge. No matter how did I try to explain my circumstances and the reasons for my absence, nothing seemed to persuade them. Only over time, the tensions eased and we managed to play together in one team again.
Today, from the perspective of a high school student, I can consider due situation more objectively. Of course, my failure was not to call anyone and warn them about the urgency that kept me away from the game. Still, I condemn any act of bullying as such, deeming it uncivilized and brutal expression of one’s emotions. While the bully never cares, the one who is bullied in that or another form always gets a psychological trauma of some kind. I therefore regard bullying as a dangerous anti-social behavior adversely affecting everyone in the process, namely those who are bullied, those who do bully, and the witnesses of bullying (Dombeck 1). The act of bullying assumes various negative outcomes, including the adverse effects on a bullied person’s mental health leading to substance use, states of depression, and eventual suicides (Kohut 22). In my situation, the best way out would be to communicate with the peers.
Unfortunately, everyone bore a grudge against me so I had no one to share my sorrow with. At least, I thought so… Luckily, there was one true friend in the whole classroom who landed me his friendly hand and gave me his sympathetic ear. Jack was the one completely unconcerned about football and not the part of our team. He forever seemed to stand aside from the mainstream life of the class. Many regarded him as eccentric and bullied him without reason. That made him even more subdued and keeping himself to himself. I was the only one who did not offend Jack. Partly, because I did not care, and partly because the acts of bullying have never appealed to me.
After three days of being bullied, Jack approached me and offered a friendly chat in school’s canteen. We were sharing sandwiches and salad while he was trying to calm me down. When I asked him why he was doing that for me, he replied that he understood my situation as no one else. Being the victim of in-class bullying, he had long ago overcome the pain of unfair treatment, biased attitude, and mockery. Then I understood the real consequences of being bullied and how dangerous the bullying was. I would have never realized it if I had not appeared in Jack’s shoes. Since then, we became the brothers-in-arms as the shared pain befriended us.
Now Jack is my best friend. I am still playing soccer in the school team, though it has nothing to do with the genuine sense of friendship. As the old saying goes, ‘a friend in need is a friend indeed.’ So is Jack; the only soul that had not turned his back from me and sincerely shared my moral pain. Today, I thank God for having Jack as my true pal. Often in life, we think that what we see is true; however, the true is when we feel. I saw soccer and my playmates as the major priority. However, Jack was a real person whom I felt.
- Dombeck, Mark ‘The Long Term Effects of Bullying’, 2007. Web.
- Kohut, M. The Complete Guide to Understanding, Controlling, and Stopping Bullies & Bullying: A Complete Guide for Teachers & Parents, 2007. Print.
