In previous generations, it was virtually unheard of for an unmarried man and woman to cohabitate. Cohabitation was reserved for when the individuals were legally married. However, social mores have changed and living together before marriage or in the absence of marriage has become quite a common occurrence. It is important to recognize that there are both benefits and drawbacks to both. This paper will compare and contrast the benefits, and therefore the drawbacks, to both situations.
Marriage is most certainly a commitment to the other person. This commitment is not only spiritual, but it is also legal. Once a person is married, he or she cannot simply “end” the relationship. Ending a marriage involves a significant amount of work and financial costs. This does not occur in living together. If a couple wants to “end it” while living together, they can simply split up their belongings and move. One or both may move out of the shared housing. It depends upon how a person views commitment to determine which the advantage is. Some people believe that a marriage certificate is “just a piece of paper.” However that piece of paper can help or even force people to work through the difficult aspects of a relationship. When a person realizes that there is significant time and expense involved in ending a relationship, they may become more committed to it. However, other people may believe that you should not stay if you do not want to. In this case, living together helps them.
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"Marriage versus Living Together".
There is most certainly a cost savings associated with living together if the people do not want to be married, but are in a serious relationship. Obviously, married people also share expenses. In previous generations, people were married at much younger ages. They did not have to establish a household before marriage. Society has changed and people live distant from their families and often do not marry at a young age. If two people know they want to be together, it does not make sense to buy two sets of furniture and furnishings. Also, they can save the extra rent or mortgage, as well as reduce utility costs. This savings may be used to provide for other goals. In a committed couple, living together is the financially wise decision. There are tax benefits associated with being married as well. However, the tax issues depend upon a number of aspects, which are beyond the scope of this discussion.
There are also religious and social aspects associated with both. By all means, marriage will always be the choice that is socially accepted to the greatest level. This may be important for an individual who is in a conservative community or has a position that requires discretion, such as a political career. It is difficult for a person to chastise another’s decision to marry; the same cannot be true for living together. If a person’s religious community is important and this decision would not be supported, the person needs to consider this. Furthermore, the individuals may want to consider the feelings of the families. Not everyone needs to or should make decisions based upon the desires of their families. However, family is important to many, particularly to those who are of a conservative religious background. These families likely will not support the choice for an unmarried couple to live together out-of-wedlock. However, this also depends upon the individuals and their situations.
Both choices offer benefits and drawbacks. Essentially, this is a personal decision that the couple must decide upon. A choice that is right for one couple will not necessarily be right for another couple.
